id be glad to
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
