hell yes lets make some ravioli
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
