do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
