It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize