Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
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