You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
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MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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