so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize
