You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
