Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
