Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
this beer tastes like vomit already
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
We're too hungover to prance.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize