i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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