One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Randomize
