I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Randomize