god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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