She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
