five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Randomize
