The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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