did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
