I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Swine flu. Run for my life!
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize
