we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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