I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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