remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
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