i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
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