Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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