Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Randomize
