Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Randomize
