I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
