Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
