and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Randomize
