You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
