She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Randomize
