My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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