Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize