The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Holy shit dude........stairs
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
