SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
