I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Randomize
