can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
