Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I just found a bag of teeth...
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize