yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Randomize
