That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
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