that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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