It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize