Are we in a gay sports bar?
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
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