Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
