Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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