evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
There r osticjed everywhere
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize