Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
