32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
