i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
