Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
