That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
