She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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